mum:
why are you sitting around in your bra?
me:
because it's got this snazzy zebra print on it?
mum:
is that really why?
me:
no. i was trying to take off my hoodie but my tank-top came with it.
mum:
and you were too lazy to put it back on.
me:
no
mum:
me:
yes
I was once pulled over for driving on the carpool lane by myself, but the cop didn’t know I was receiving road-head from my girlfriend and he asked where she came from. I looked him in the eyes gave him somewhat of a signal and there was an awkward pause. He stepped back and said “Drive safely now.”
